No, you don’t need cake (Or anything else either, honestly)...
I recently saw on Instagram a post from Georgia Toffolo who, after giving her guests just 48 hours notice, eloped to Scotland and got married. She created 7 rule breaking tips for brides and grooms to save money, or to just challenge the way we think about the wedding routine; such as not seeing each other before the big day. Georgia stripped back her wedding grabbing £2 daffies from the supermarket commenting 'flowers are overpriced and over rated', and allowed the children to bake a cake the morning of the wedding stating 'cakes are a complete waste of money'. So do you really need expensive flowers, 4 tier cake, the whole 9 yard? Well, she does kind of have a point BUT here me out.
What is a wedding? You only really need 2 people in love, 2 witnesses and a registrar to get legally married. This can be done in most, if not all registry offices, for around £60! So why does the current average wedding spend sit at £25k? Social media. The likes of Facebook, Instagram, Tik Tok and Pinterest constantly ram down our throats luxurious wedding venues, artistically decorated settings, photos of hundreds of guests in co-ordinating outfits, fireworks, and the latest wedding trend and must haves. So it can be really easy to get caught up and focus on the latest obsession, or fad and want to plan this huge 3 day event that may even be unattainable, but wouldn't it look incredible on an Insta reel... In light of seeing these stunning wedding examples, model couples (and sometimes this is what we ARE seeing, models!) I do feel in some aspect we have lost what it actually means to get married.
Marriage is primarily about union, commitment, and love. Not caviar, fireworks and huge debts.
However, weddings are about celebration, a coming together of families to be as one. So why not indulge and make it a day to remember? Do I have my own opinion on what is 'important' or not. Yes. But its not my day, so I am not going to sit on my high horse and dictate to who ever wants to read this. After shooting lots of weddings across Dorset, Somerset, Hampshire and Wiltshire I've come to realise that each wedding day, despite a very similar time line, is unique and it is primarily down to the couple and the guests they choose to invite. I have attended weddings with 18 guests, and weddings with 300 guests. Both have been incredible. Why? Because the day was what the couple wanted, it reflected who they were. And I have to say, although there was around 280 guest difference between the two weddings, the vibe was very similar between them. They both had very high energy, tonnes of fun, lots of laughter and dancing and some animals thrown in too. They had a vision for their day and stuck to it, not for likes and follows but each element was thought out and encapsulated them as a couple.
Equally, I feel we live in a world where we work really hard, and often do not have time to play. Georgia Toffolo quite possibly has the option to attend luxurious events, have her hair and make up done regularly, and dress up to the nines. For some brides and grooms this will be a one off experience to don an outfit that makes you look and feel incredible, to sit and have your hair done, or to eat in a 5* venue with food fit for a royal family. So if we work hard, why not play hard too? As an aside, I am not encouraging couples to get into huge amounts of debt for this though....
So do you need cake, expensive flowers, a fancy car, a three course meal; No. Do you need a photographer. Or a horse-drawn carriage. Or a marching band. No. But if you want it, bloody go for it! If cake makes you happy, eat it. If a live band makes you happy, book it. If none of that matters, that’s fine too.
Your wedding doesn’t define your love. You do.
